How to handle Sibling Rivalry, helping your children to get along

The arrival of sibling in the family is almost always accompanied with hostilities and rivalries by their elder siblings in different stages of their lives. As beautiful as the relation between the siblings, it is often eclipsed by the fights between them due to jealousies, competition, popularity with parents and deprivation of something which the other sibling has. Rivalry resumes not only during childhood but also pave its way into adulthood as demonstrated and studied in adult sibling rivalry case studies. They might be jealous of their siblings for how well off they are, how much money they make, having better careers or spouses and likewise. These rivalries often lead to a broken family, lack of communication, discord and disconnection in the later years.


Family cohesion is very crucial for a better society. It is the responsibility of parents to keep the family united and on the same page and teach the children to always be there for each other through thick and thin. Avoid conflicts by bringing the children similar gifts.

Appreciate them for their successes and motivate them during failure. Never let them compete with one another. Regarding the fights between the siblings, parents must always listen to both the conflicting parties and do justice among them. Never ever prefer your one child over the other. Every individual is unique, so avoid comparing one with the other child as it might lower their self esteem and demotivate them for the rest of their lives. The reason is that you cannot judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree. Meaning to say that each individual has his own cup of tea.

If you bring up your children in cooperative environment, they will always stay united throughout their lives. They will be there for each other in the times of need. Be it financial matters, emotional support or a sincere advice. A cohesive family helps in later family lives of siblings as well when their children (cousins) get together on family vacations, picnics and tours together. In this way, a person feels much safer and secure when he knows he got his family and siblings to watch his back. In the broader perspective, a strong cohesive family results in a strong welfare society, diminishing the cases of abandonment, poverty and crime rate and making the world a better place.

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